Bye again!

Vincent got up at 7 a.m. last Monday to mow the lawn, which we wanted him to do before he went to Ohio with his father. I wondered why he got up so early, but it turn it started raining at 9 a.m. (psychic!). Stopping at Burger King on the way, Stephanie and Vincent drove to the library, where Vincent did the final two hours of the 20 volunteer hours he was required to do, in connection with his senior project at school. After walking back home, Vincent got ready to go and learned that his father had ended up working all day and would not arrive in Louisville until later. After I got home from work, we took Vincent to get his hair cut (pictured above), and then the three of us went to Frisch’s Big Boy restaurant (with its salad and soup bar and fresh strawberry pie). Vincent’s father faced some problems getting to us, apparently getting into traffic jam and then getting lost. After an hour of Stephanie and I walking the dog and Vincent reading at Borders (Vincent pictured waiting for us after the haircut, below top), we went back home (where Vincent picked up some more stuff but still left others – remember that he had two cavities when he returned from Denmark, where he had not worn his retainer for very long). Vincent’s father finally arrived a little after 9 p.m. and Vincent and his father headed off for dinner for Vincent’s father and what would be a very late driving back to Ohio (pictured driving away below bottom).

The day before Vincent’s father arrived he told us that his Stevens Johnson disease – which Stephanie and I believe is a essentially an allergic reaction to his historic drug use (though he highlighted diet as a cause) – which causes skin reactions (and can be fatal).

When Vincent’s father and Stephanie and I were getting along much worse, I used to spend a lot of energy counting down the number of times that we’d still have to negotiate, execute, and worry about visitation and visitation transfers of Vincent. (Visitation transfers – if not the visitation themselves, for Vincent – were scary events for the three of us. They often developed into big arguments with Vincent’s father (and, for a long time, with Vincent’s then stepmother), and we always feared that Vincent’s father would physically attack us.)

I remember when the number was 12 or 13. Now, after Vincent’s 11 days visiting with his father this summer (and this past spring’s very unusual spring break visitation), there will now be only ONE MORE visitation to deal with.

Vincent may choose to visit his father – or even to live with his father – after he graduates from high school – but we won’t be responsible for arranging those visits or for dealing with Vincent’s father. It’s extremely remotely possible that Vincent’s father will visit to go to Vincent’s high school or college graduation, but I doubt it. (Vincent’s father stayed put at the Daytona 500 some eight years ago instead of driving over on Interstates 95 and 10 to watch Vincent, then in 4th grade, star in a school play, in Quincy – see “ “). I suppose it’s possible that we will visit friends and family members in Ohio – post-high school – it’s hard for me to imagine how this will all work out – and Vincent will go on the visit with us and want to visit with his father and relatives on that side of the family. But it seems likely that we may not have to deal with Vincent’s father (as interesting a character as he is) at all after this winter break! After that: no more Hamas/Tommy!

-- Perry